"You make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven."

[boywhokeepsliving]

Who: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger (post order)
What: That awkward moment where everything is fucking awkward
Where: Harry's apartment, London
When: Friday night

Harry was barely in the door of his apartment when he found it rudely slammed shut and himself roughly shoved up against the back of it. His wand was out and jammed against the intruder's throat, an AK on the tip of tongue, when he realised who the intruder actually was. "Dra--" was all he got out before he had a set of exceptionally talented lips dominated his in a kiss that was so hungry that his head banged against the back of the door. Harry lowered his wand at first and ended up just dropping it on the floor and kicking it to the side so he could grab the back of Draco's hair and return the kiss with just as much force. He heard a rip and subconsciously logged somewhere in the back of his mind that, damnit, another shirt ruined and he would need a trip to Marks & Spencer soon... without telling Draco, of course. The blonde bitch had banned him from that store, so Harry had to ninja his way to get shopping now and again. No one made undies like Marks & Sparks.

He pulled out of the kiss breathlessly, wetting his lips. "Wait. I need to lock the door. Keys... and shit," he mumbled distractedly and locked the main lock of his door and then secured the second padlock he had on hand for privacy. Hermione and Ron both had keys, but sometimes, he just wanted to be alone. Or in this case, not so much on the alone. His shirt was hanging open and he kicked out of his shoes. "I had such a shit day at work. You're lucky I just two Red Bulls on the way one or this wouldn't even be on the menu, you know. I had this witness who swore she saw someone knocked out with a stick. I mean, it was obviously a wand, and I'm looking into who it was, but she was hysterical and had her tits all hanging out in this shirt that should seriously be banned. I mean, how do those sorts of clothes not cut off circulation, you know?" he bitched, flinging a sock off somewhere to the left of his living room.

Comments

[imtoosexy]

Finding his kiss cut off, Draco stood there, running his tongue along the inside of his cheek as Harry went off on a ramble about... well, Draco didn't really have much of a clue because he tuned out after 'I had such a shit day at work' so he could scratch at his temple with his thumbnail in boredom and roll his eyes. He waited for Harry to finish and quirked a judgemental eyebrow at the comment about tits. Draco had about as much interest in tits as he did of dousing his own dick in gasoline and setting it on fire. "You would know all about shirts that need banning," he offered and sauntered up to Harry. "I really don't give a flying toss about your work. I think you just need to shut the fuck up and screw me, bitch. I've waited three whole days while you disappeared playing Bore & Order in the Muggle world and I think I was very nice in doing so. You owe me a basketful of gratitude, and preferably on your knees between my legs or the cheeks of my arse, and stat!" he stated with a snap of his fingers.

He gave Harry a devious smirk before he pushed him backwards and kept pushing him right through to his bedroom and shoved him onto the bed where he climbed up to straddle over him. "I seriously hate this room, you know. The wallpaper is giving me colitis, I swear to Merlin and all his bitches." But that was the last comment he made before he was working expertly to get Harry out of his work clothes. It wasn't like they weren't well-practised with any of this and they were soon naked with Draco knelt up over Harry, gripping hold of the bed head as he moaned at the crazily fucking brilliant sensation of Harry's trail wetly tracking up the length of his dick like it was made to be attached there. And frankly, if it was permanently, Draco wouldn't have a single complaint whatsoever.

[sassyfaghagwitch]

The last person Hermoine had wanted to spend the entire morning in a meeting with was her estranged husband. But as long as there were international Quidditch matches, there would be times when she and Ron had to be in meetings together, and she was just going to have to deal. So she'd kept her all-business wits about her and worn her best poker face until the meeting was over, then made sure that the rest of her duties for the day had been handled before leaving the Ministry and making her way to her best friend's apartment. Sometimes Ron could just be so utterly thick, and Hermoine was well prepared to blow off a little steam with Harry.

Huffing all the way, she quickly closed the space that separated her from her friend's door, and fiddled in her bag for the key until she found it, unlocking the doorknob and turning it to let herself in. Only it didn't let her in. The door was still quite firmly locked with the deadbolt, and Hermoine swore under her breath. She didn't have that key, and Harry usually never locked that lock, either. Of course it would be locked when she needed her friend and his other best friend was being so utterly stupid. Hermoine really wondered sometimes what she'd ever seen in Ron, though at the end of the day, the fact remained that she had never fully gotten over loving him, and that drove her more than a little bit crazy. Still, she was in no mood to dwell on the fact that she cared about Ron Weasley at all. Instead, she very much wanted to explain to Harry in very vivid detail every single way that Ron was lacking. So without a second though, once the hallway was cleared, Hermoine found her wand in her bag and quietly whispered, "Alohomora!" The lock opened, she stormed into the apartment, and found that Harry wasn't in the living room at all. "Harry!" she called out, trying to keep the bite out of her tone that was directed at Ron and not aim it at Harry. "Dammit, Harry, where are you?"

And that was when she heard it... Coming from the bedroom, the sounds of what could only be a struggle, and Hermoine's face went pale. Wand raised and at the ready, she charged down the hallway and into Harry's room, and then she just stopped. Because what she saw was probably the last thing in the world she ever expected to see... maybe second last if you included Ron Weasley showing up at their apartment with flowers and a genuine apology, but that truly was beside the point, because what was right in front of Hermoine's face? Was Harry Potter sucking a dick... which in and of itself might not have been so shocking, had the aforementioned dick not been attached to Draco Malfoy himself. Draco? Of all the dicks in the world, Harry had his lips wrapped around Draco's?! What the hell? "Oh, Merlin's beard!" she swore, shaking her head in disbelief. "What the bloody hell is going on here?!"

[boywhokeepsliving]

Harry would be a big fat giant liar if he didn't admit to himself that he spent a good portion of his day letting his mind wander to fantasies that played out very much like the reality right now. Of course, that was without the part where they got rudely interrupted right when Draco was doing this amazingly talented thing with his hips that was coaxing Harry's deep-throating skills on to the max. And then some. If someone had told him back in school that one day he would love sucking Draco Malfoy's dick, he probably would have hit them with an Unforgivable Curse quicker than they could say 'blow'. But things had just... happened. Not even just that, but he and Draco were actually officially dating and had been for over a year now. It was just kept very on the hush and because of that, there was always room for bantering over whether they were actually official or not. Draco had a massive reputation as a player who wouldn't settle after his failed marriage to Astoria Greengrass and Harry was the Wizarding World's Most Eligible Bachelor (according to the Daily Prophet, Quibbler, Lumosity magazine). It helped keep up their ruse, and whilst they had a few very close shaves in the past, they had never been caught. Being a wizard made keeping secrets easy. They could Apparate to each other's places without being seen, Harry had his Invisibility Cloak, there was the Confundus Charm if really necessary. Harry liked the secrecy, it gave him something he didn't have to really share with the rest of the world. Plus, he wasn't sure he was ready to commit and didn't believe Draco would long-term commit anyway. Ironically, Draco was happy to go public and often threatened Harry with it when they had one of their many spats. They were still chalk and cheese at the end of the day. They would always bicker.

Getting caught by Hermione was just really, really inconvenient. It was awkward, it sucked, and it pissed Harry off because he was really enjoying the blow job and he knew the way Draco was encouraging his fingers in his arse as he accepted the blow job that he was about to bottom and let Harry go to town once Harry got him off first. They had been together long enough, they just had an easy rhythm now. Until something screwed that up, of course.

Harry had no choice but to release his mouth from Draco's cock to shriek, "HERMIONE!" He didn't mean to shriek indignantly like a girl, his voice raising a few octaves, but he was totally mortified being caught like this and that was before he even let the penny drop that they were just 100% exposed and there was no turning back. Not with Hermione, she was way too smart. He scrambled to grab some of the messy blankets to try and cover them up, accidentally shoving Draco off him in the process. This wasn't going to end well.

[imtoosexy]

Fucking giant hippogriff balls fried in a vat of oil and strung from Satan's arsehole. Why the hell did Potter have all the fucking bad luck in the entire universe? Why the hell did he have to be the one Draco wanted to fuck? Well, that particular question was one he asked himself at least five times a day, but that was beside the point. It was a point of contention that they were hushed on their relationship. Most would probably assume it was Draco who wanted to keep it secret, but it wasn't. Draco was done moonlighting and pretending to be something he wasn't. He had to go to hell and back doing that when he was forced to serve Voldemort, and he had swore blind in his own growing up to adulthood that he wouldn't do that shit again. If people didn't like who he was, they could go fuck themselves on a spiny anteater. He was proud of who he was these days. He was very out and normally, he wouldn't bother with this moonlighting shit. But... it was Harry. And there was still a part of him that continued to hate that. Harry was his Achilles Heel, and even if he would never actually admit to it, he was in love with the bastard. That just happened without him realising, and by the time he did, he was in too deep. Which was why he would prefer to publicly stake his claim on the Boy Who Sucked Dick so everyone knew who he belonged to. But Harry didn't want to deal with all the publicity, and Draco went along with that, though the more they progressed, the more it began to irk him.

So, he wasn't entirely pissed off at being outed. What he was pissed off at was that Granger interrupted their fucking. Generally, no one interrupted Draco fucking and got away with it without consequence, but fucking Granger was the exception to the rule, because she just had to go and be one of Harry's best friends, and there was some sort of unwritten rule against hexing your lover's best friends. It would get too messy, and he didn't want that.

"For fuck's sake, don't you know that when a door is locked that you don't have a key to, it means keep the fuck out. If he can't get it up after this, I'm following you home and standing out your door to play In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida on stereo outside your bedroom window without a way to turn it off," Draco bitched at her with a pissed of sneer on his lips. He smooshed a pillow over Harry's face and piled the covers up on top of his head as punishment for shoving him off and then stood up to give a casual shrug with an indifferent sniff. "Surprise?

[sassyfaghagwitch]

Seriously, of all the things in the world Hermione could've expected, this wasn't even way down the list. It was more like not even on the list at all. Harry and Draco had been sworn enemies as children, and despite how much Draco had grown and changed, Hermione didn't think it would ever be enough to warrant the scene she'd just walked in on. "H... Harry!" she stammered, looking back at Draco and lowering her wand. "Dr... What... How did... How long have you... Oh, dear God." There was seriously no way to wrap her head around this. Hermione was a smart woman... Very smart in fact. You didn't get to be head of the Department of International Magical Cooperation in your twenties by being an idiot. But this whole thing was seriously doing her head in, and in quick order, too. And then there was Draco standing there starkers in all his glory (and for all her swearing later that she hadn't looked at all, Hermione couldn't deny that he did have certain assets that she could very much see and appreciate), with the same devil-may-care attitude that had driven Harry crazy in completely different ways at Hogwarts, and was now making Hermione question just what the hell she had come here to talk about in the first place.

Ron. Yes, Ron. She needed to talk to Harry about Ron. But wouldn't her husband... in the better days of their marriage, of course... have gotten the shock of his life to hear this story? Not that he'd hear it now. It was hardly his business with whom Harry was getting his sex on, and it certainly wasn't her place to tell him. Not that she even would. She was hardly his biggest fan right now. But that was beside the point. She'd just caught her best friend sucking the dick of someone they'd all once hated. Nevermind the fact that they all knew that Draco had changed and grown confident and just better as a person, that didn't mean that you were suddenly supposed to find your best friend with the guy's dick in his mouth. Shaking her head, she stepped back from Harry and Draco, her hands held up in front of her. "This isn't... When did this happen?!" The threat from Draco just earned him an irritated glare as Hermione crossed her arms over her chest. "My bedroom windows are soundproofed, Malfoy," she snapped. Why the hell did her timing have to be so shit?

[boywhokeepsliving]

Harry just laid there with a groan and smacked his hand over his eyes. He heard the acidic bitchy streak start to wheedle it's way back into Draco's accusatory tone. Seriously, only a fucking Slytherin could get caught in the act red-handed and manage to make it all sound like someone else was 100% at fault. It was a natural talent that people with an actual conscience would never be able to quite hone, no matter how much they tried. Harry just wanted all of this to be very much not happening. Like, at all. He wished he could be anywhere but here. Hell, fighting Voldemort again would probably be a lot less painful than this. It wasn't just the fuck they had been sprung in the middle of fucking and in a very awkward-looking situation (yes, it only looked awkward, because it had felt anything but to Harry), it was that he had been keeping this secret from his closest friends for a very long time, and he wasn't ready to share it yet. But tough titties, apparently. Not that titties were involved, but the gist was still there. He would probably never actually be ready to deal with it, and now he had to. He was also going to have to deal with Hermione's wounded BFF deal where she probably made him feel like a piece of toe fungus for keeping important secrets from her, and how he should know by now that he could trust her... even if he couldn't trust Ron. Because this sort of thing always came with a swipe at Ron. The toiler paper could run out in Siberia and it would be Ronald Weasley's fault every single time. Harry was tired of being piggy-in-the-middle of the shitstorm with his best friends. That was another part of why he enjoyed being with Draco. Draco just didn't give a fuck about anything and he wasn't pitching Harry's loyalty against anyone.

One hand was still over his eyes and he pointed blindly in Hermione's direction with the other. "One, that's not going to stop him," he began in a huffy, snippy mutter. "And two, don't you freaking know how to knock? We've been over this. Whatever Ron has done, it can bloody wait when my door is locked twice." He pulled his hand from his face so he could shoot her a glare for emphasis, only to cop an eyeful of Draco's bare arse and cock right there in reaching distance, taunting him with what had just been very rudely stolen from him. There was another groan and he grabbed a pillow to try to suffocate himself. "Fuck my life," was the dramatic, muffled bitching from underneath it.

[imtoosexy]

"If he kills himself, you're cleaning up the mess and getting rid of the body," Draco told Hermione blandly and then gave a little dismissive flick of his fingers. "And if you two are going to have a cute little Gryffindor love domestic, I'm out of here because I had to lobster for lunch and I really don't want to regurgitate it all over your shoes. Even if someone really should regurgitate something on them, because seriously, who even wears purple suede on their feet who isn't a geriatric with halitosis or Dumbledore?" he asked her, scrunching his nose up with an air of distaste. He might have made nice with Harry and his sidekicks over the years, but that didn't mean he couldn't ultimately resist the urge to be a judgemental bitch. A leopard never really did change all their spots, not that he would ever wear polka dots. Which was the exact moment he realised Granger's blouse was just that and he closed his eyes momentarily, lips moving in a silent prayer that the bad fashion sense wasn't catching by breathing the same air space.

And he was about to leave the room too, until a thought dawned on him. "Hang on, why should he tell you everything? Is the bloody poor bastard even allowed to take a shit without you two bugging his bathroom and stalking him via CCTV to watch his every move? Do you know how long his cock is and whether he's cut too?" Then he held his hand up with a slight shudder. "No, don't answer that because I don't even want to know. I've only just gotten out of therapy for a fucked up childhood, I don't need to end up there for recurrent nightmares of Weasleycest. Harry's practically adopted by them these days, I keep expected to find ginger pubes sprouting every time I go down on him."

[sassyfaghagwitch]

Hermione was honestly wishing she'd taken the polite route and accepted Harry's double-locked door as a sign that he needed his space. Although, she was rather glad she knew the truth now, considering that her best friend had hardly been forthcoming with any information about the apparent object of his affection... or at the very least, lust. Hermione really wasn't sure at this point which it was, but something about the situation just didn't give her a feeling she was looking at a first time thing. They looked a bit too used to being all up on each other. "Draco, do you honestly think that my shoes are the first of my worries? I have a lot more important things on my plate than whatever your idea of fashion is, and I assure you, there is nothing whatsoever wrong with what I'm wearing. It's suitable for someone of my position." At least she hoped it was. Did she seriously look that bad? And after all that time she'd spent trying to choose a more sophisticated wardrobe when she and Ron had split... Her shoes were quite nice! And who the bloody hell was Draco to tell her they weren't when he wasn't wearing clothes at all? Oh, she'd give him a piece of her mind, but Harry... Harry was still in a pose of utter mortification, and the last thing that he probably needed at this point was for Draco and Hermione to have a fight of epic proportions in his bedroom.

"Harry," she said, giving Draco an annoyed glare and quite pointedly ignoring his questioning completely. "I'm sorry that I burst in like that. It was an awful day at work, and I just thought maybe you'd have time to talk. I'll be more... understanding of your double lock next time, I promise. Now... I suppose... Oh, dear God, what the hell do you do in a situation like this one?!" She was pretty sure Draco would have an answer to that in short order, too, though she wasn't sure she wanted said answer from him. "I should... I should go."